Five days ago, drag was banned from !politicalmemes@lemmy.world for using neopronouns. A comment explaining drag’s pronouns, and a comment saying “drag” isn’t a nickname, were removed with the reason “trolling”. Drag understands why someone would think that using different pronouns than most people is trolling - transphobia. However, drag is confused how on earth not liking a nickname is a violation of any rules anywhere.
Context of the removed comments:
Drag would like to pre-empt any further accusations of trolling by asking a question: If drag were a right wing troll, and you chose to freely accept drag’s pronouns, wouldn’t that completely neuter the trolling attempt? Trolling is about trying to make others upset. You don’t have to get upset when someone uses unusual pronouns. If you aren’t transphobic, then it’s impossible to troll you that way. And drag promises: drag wants you to not be transphobic. Drag is not trying to upset anyone. If you do what drag wants you to do, then you get what you want too. This is a non-issue, there’s only a problem if you want there to be.
EDIT: DRAG DID NOT TELL ANYBODY TO USE DRAG’S PREFERRED PRONOUNS.
YDI, you came to a community and weren’t contributing to the discussion and immediately decided to pivot the discussion to yourself. In addition your persistent and off-topic discussion about neopronouns could be viewed as trolling by others. It’s very similar to what another user DroneRights was doing a while back, though though their posts and comments were much more hostile and aggressive towards others. Yours are less aggressive but still give off the same vibes.
Maybe it was a bit extreme for them to permaban you for that but after dealing with DroneRights I can’t say I blame them.
Drag didn’t change the topic to dragself. Someone else decided to interrogate drag about drag’s pronouns. Would you have preferred drag ignore them? Denigrate the question and tell them to go away, because drag doesn’t want to discuss that topic? That’s how drag felt, but drag chose to be polite, and now you’re mad at drag for that.
It’s really confusing because you seem to be using “drag” both for yourself and other people as well, so I’m having a hard time reading what you are saying. Even AI doesn’t know what exactly to make of this word salad so if I got it wrong I apologize. However this is also likely the reason why people thought you were a troll, many trolls or spammers post incomprehensible word salad as part of their whole thing.
They actually weren’t interrogating you, they pointed out that referring to oneself in the third person is cringe, which it is. They were also pointing out that your use of “drag” would typically be seen as a nickname in the contexts you’re using it. That’s how language works, other people have to be on the same page about language otherwise communication doesn’t happen. And personalized first person pronouns aren’t a thing in English because they just don’t work well and make sentences hard to understand.
Then there is your history which is the fact that you’ve been having these fights with other people (i.e. @FlyingSquid@lemmy.world claimed in the thread that you’ve been harassing him about this stuff) which does factor in to the judgement that this is trolling. Add to that the fact that your username “dragonfucker” doesn’t help your credibility, in this perception of you, and even though you changed the display name and can’t change your username it still doesn’t help your cause.
As an example, if a person named Joe posts a discussion thread about the implications of trans women in sports as a neutral discussion it’ll probably be fine. If a person named trump4prezi2025 posts it they’ll probably get a lot more negative responses than they otherwise would because their username affects how people see them. In your case your provocative and profane username combined with your past behavior leads many people to think you are a troll, and therefore to ban you from communities, and in one case (dubvee.org) an entire Lemmy instance.
deleted by creator
I saw that, you weren’t fast enough.
“Denigrate the question and tell them to go away, because drag doesn’t want to discuss that topic?” seems like you’re using drag to refer to someone else who doesn’t want to discuss that topic but maybe I’m wrong, it’s really confusing because you’e using first person and second person at the same time. Wouldn’t surprise me if you also are using them in place of generics for others as well.
Let’s ask him directly, I’m sure he’d have something different to say considering he claimed you were harassing him over claiming that they/them are acceptable generic gender neutral pronouns for people who you don’t know the preferred pronouns of. Also no offense but he has more credibility than you do, as I explained “dragonfucker”.
Sure. I told them that “they/them” and “you” are universal pronouns and that they are acceptable to use with anyone and that I will use them with anyone and this person decided that meant that I only use those pronouns and not that it’s acceptable to use them universally since they are non-gendered. You can even use them with other species that have no sexual dimorphism at all, let alone the concept of gender (i.e.) “did you see the bacteria in the petri dish? They’re really reproducing fast!” Or even inanimate objects: “okay, I installed more RAM. You better work this time.”
They decided me explaining that ‘they’ applies to everyone from Donald Trump to Laverne Cox means that if I don’t use those pronouns, this lovely person gets to harass me about it.
Including when I called Caillou “he.” As in the cartoon little boy.
And guess what? I would also call a dragon, which do not exist, “they.”
Edit: I forgot to say that if you look in your comment history, you will see that when it comes to other people, Drag here thinks “they” and “you” and even gendered pronouns are fine.
Edit 2: Fucking LOL!
Anyone includes cartoon toddlers. Seems like you’re just making up problems because you like drama.
I am not the one making things up. Not only are you still intentionally misreading what I am saying, you are also just outright lying about me “making up problems.”
https://lemmy.world/comment/13091755
I assume this will begin a whole new round of harassment.
Okay whatever. Seems like you only use the “I they/them EVERYONE” rationale when it’s time to ignore a trans person’s gender, but drag will continue to give you the benefit of the doubt and act as though you they/them caillou too. Drag isn’t interested in giving you that fight you want. Drag isn’t interested in fighting or antagonising anyone.
It’s actually not that hard to respect what a nonbinary person prefers be it neopronouns, binary pronouns, or agender pronouns.
It’s also not hard to accept that ‘they’ and ‘you’ applies to everyone regardless of gender. And non-humans. And inanimate objects.
If ‘you’ is good enough for both my mother and a toaster, it’s good enough for them. There is no disrespect.
And if someone wants respect, following me around to various communities and harassing me when I call a little cartoon boy ‘he’ is not a way to earn it.
While this is the first time I’ve run into someone replacing the primary pronouns, I don’t see any reason to undermine drag just because of what language conventions allow for. Language is more defined by practical usage rather than explicit rules.
Let me give you my perspective. They/them pronouns are de-gendering rather than gender-affirming, because in English “they” refers to anyone, including men or women. In practical terms, “they” is often used as a cop-out by people who want to avoid calling trans women “she” or trans men “he”.
I can’t help but see drags use of drag/dragself as just another part of pushing back on de-gendering in the same way as any nonbinary trans person listing binary pronouns and asking people to stick to using those.