I think we’re saying the same thing, I’m just adding an additional line:
Coping = short term numbing the pain.
Survival Strategy/Crutch = long term numbing the pain.
Healing = working through those feelings.
And in this framework, sure, some coping mechanisms are healthier than others, but since they’re all short-term only and allow you to move into the headspace to heal, they’re basically all valid and healthy for that purpose.
And most people will use some sort of crutch to get into that headspace.
Missing out on a promotion and drawing a painting right in your bosses office after receiving the message is as difficult and unrealistic as sitting down right there and then and meditating on that feeling. Most people will try to make it through the day with distraction, be it alcohol, work, sugar or all of them combined. Once people are home, then they will paint their picture, go for a walk, sit down and meditate, talk to a friend, whatever their healing strategy may be.
And people who continue with their coping strategy turn it into a crutch. And that is when it becomes unhealthy.
The main advantage of having this short-long term differentiation is preventing the shame of using something addictive and thus causing you to beat yourself up over it. But other than that distinction I agree with your points fully.
I think we’re saying the same thing, I’m just adding an additional line:
Coping = short term numbing the pain. Survival Strategy/Crutch = long term numbing the pain. Healing = working through those feelings.
And in this framework, sure, some coping mechanisms are healthier than others, but since they’re all short-term only and allow you to move into the headspace to heal, they’re basically all valid and healthy for that purpose.
And most people will use some sort of crutch to get into that headspace.
Missing out on a promotion and drawing a painting right in your bosses office after receiving the message is as difficult and unrealistic as sitting down right there and then and meditating on that feeling. Most people will try to make it through the day with distraction, be it alcohol, work, sugar or all of them combined. Once people are home, then they will paint their picture, go for a walk, sit down and meditate, talk to a friend, whatever their healing strategy may be.
And people who continue with their coping strategy turn it into a crutch. And that is when it becomes unhealthy.
The main advantage of having this short-long term differentiation is preventing the shame of using something addictive and thus causing you to beat yourself up over it. But other than that distinction I agree with your points fully.