The United States is (not very) slowly sliding into full blown fascism. Things are getting less progressive here, not more. If you think that the current elimantionist rhetoric centered around trans people won’t make its way to you and your husband, then you haven’t read a single word of history. Shit’s about to get a whole lot worse for folks.
You can spin up your own mumble server. It’s not that hard, and then once you have that running, you just tell your friends to download the mobile client and boom. You’re done