“Why do we eat the fungi that taste good and not the ones that give you explosive diarrhea?”
Some moulds are totally fine, see blue cheese. Some mycelium schlongs are dangerous, see death caps.
“Mycelium schlong”
Linguistic creativity at its best.
You can also put mold on meat. Lot trickier, but the famous Hungarian salami Téliszalámi (Winter Salami) is done like that.
See also other soft cheeses like brie
99% of mold gives humans something between mild discomfort and death. The remaining 1% tastes good with butter.
Not quiet
98.99% of mold gives humans something between mild discomfort and death, 1% tastes good with butter. The the remaining 0.01% is estimated to have saved over half a billion lives.
And 0.00001% makes me see and feel funny things
More of them do that, but only once.
Pretty sure the antibiotics also taste good with butter.
What doesn’t taste good with butter?
Kale, raw fresh fruit, sushi.
Plain yogurt, lettuce, candies.
It ain’t plain if it’s with butter
more butter
And then there are the few lucky people who die a whole lot faster if they take that .01%
Ah, so there are 3 options- discomfort, death, and nutrition. Therefore, every time you eat a fungus, you have a 1/3 chance of dying. Thanks for the info!
NotHowStatisticsWork
True; some mold is actually medicine. Therefore you only have 1/4 chance of dying.
1/5, some are hallucinogens
Yeah? Then successfully explain how statistics work, smart guy. But I warn you, there’s a 50% chance you’ll fail.
It’s actually 50% because it either kills you or is doesn’t. Those are the two options.
You both sound correct. No idea who to trust, so I guess there’s a 50:50 chance that it’s 50% or that it’s one in three.
Oh, you like math? Name all the numbers.
Just as believing in a deity gives you a 50% chance of salvation.
Or when growing in cheese.
Cheese also tastes good with butter.
No one:
Everyone: adds a pointless “No one:” above perfectly valid memes
And on top of that, a pointless Twitter comment.
I swear, every meme nowadays is three levels of reaction deep.
But how will i drive engagement to my shitter page if i don’t slap my username on every meme I find?
POV: Someone added a useless “no one” to their meme
POV: you’re the other person watching someone else do the action being described
This one grinds my gears too because it doesn’t even make sense.
“No one said nothing” is a double negative. Shouldn’t it be
Everyone:
Or just
(awkward) silence
Humans: 🤮
Human genitalia: 🍆💨👃🤤
Most molds are about as closely related to mushrooms as flatworms are to humans
Not to be confused with ringworms which are, in fact, a mold.
Or slime molds which are, in fact, an ameoba.
Now there’s a creature that really breaks our language conventions. Forget indeterminate gender, we can’t decide if it’s one creature or many at any given time.
And humans are more closely related to mushrooms than plants!
“why is that we eat the fruit and not the tree?”
Cinnamon
Maple syrup
Why apple but not apple seed
i eat the apple seeds, coward
dies
Both are pictures of genitalia, one of them is just really really small, microscopic even, so you are being very insensitive towards the microscopic genitalia.
It doesn’t need to be big to do it’s job!😡
I feel seen
Whoa there… We eat mold too if they’re the right type and on the right things.
*Blu cheese has entered the chat*
Blue cheese would like a word.
Wait I thought mushrooms were the flowers… Or are you telling me that flowers are also genitals!!! 💥
Flowers are flowers genitals as well.
So they’re manspreading
Yep lol just wait till you find out what pollen is analogous too lol
So bees are slutty sex pests and fly around covered in plant cum…
Yes… But technically they’re performing In Bee-tro fertilization (IBF) … I’ll show myself out
Ha! I read that they’re loyal to their favourite flower… Fetish?
brb, i have a fursona to make
What a life.
It’s more like they’re the unicorns to angiosperms. Meanwhile non angiosperm plants are the guy who busts a nut on the bus
Poppycock.
This bacterium gives me the sniffles. This other bacterium liquefies and eats my muscles. But if I don’t have enough of this other bacterium in me, I get violent explosive shits??
the difference between eating mushrooms and eating mold is the difference between oral sex and vore
Wait am I supposed to just motion the mushroom in and out repeatedly then once it shrivels, the job is done?
Cheese and yoghurt enter the chat.
laughs in alcohol
If the french eat frogs that’s fine, but when the south Americans do it everyone loses their minds.
(Poison dart frogs)