Make it a good one.
Land the time machine on top of the first animal to walk on land. Don’t even have to get out of the machine.
I’d sink Cortez’s ship.
Go back from 2026 to 2024. Report a pet has gone missing and you heard that an immigrant neighbor ate it. Come back to 2026. Book your dream vacation at the Trump Gaza resort.
Well current events lead me to believe that allowing the orange turd to live would do the job nicely so in the spirit of laziness I’d do absolutely nothing.
Life will find a way. Going back can be used to create nuclear winter but even then, life will go on.
To completely screw over the world, I would go into the future and acquire the source code for a general AI.
Then the world can be locked down and robots can be built to abuse every human and sentinent being individually, for a very long time.
Can I appear anywhere? Pop into white house or Kremlin during the Cuban missile crisis and say: I’m from the future, you must attack, or… Then travel back to the future without finishing the sentence.
Shoot Arch Duke Ferdinand. Few people even now about it today, but he was subject to a horribly mangled assassination attempt that many scholars belive would have set off a major war in Europe had he died.
Holy crap it took way too long for me to realise what you’re doing
Go back in time and do something to prevent Vasily Aleksandrovich Arkhipov from becoming the Executive Officer on the B-59 Soviet nuclear sub in October 1962. He’s the guy who talked the Captain and the Political Officer out of launching the nukes when they thought they were being attacked by the US Navy during the Cuban Missile Crisis. His persuasiveness is generally considered to have avoided WWIII from starting then.
He probably literally saved the world, he should really be talked about more
The scary part is, he’s not the only one
You could also flip the switch that was literally the only thing keeping the nuke from exploding over North Carolina in the Goldsboro incident.
Nuke going off over US soil at the height of the cold war could very well have started everyone firing.
Procrastinate, the world is going down the drain just fine without my help.
Go to back to the big bang. You presence alone will butterfly effect the earth out of existence.
I legit popped this thread open to type
ohhh I wish I wish I hadn’t killed that fish…
You’re going to pretend we’re not on that timeline right now? I see your play, time traveller.
He did it.
The crazy son of a bitch did it.
Go back to before life formed on earth, and shit in the ocean.
It’s possible someone did, and that’s where we all come from
it would explain a lot
“Hey look! It’s the first fish to walk on land”
*stomps
“You saw it, it was coming right at us”
You would immediately die in agony. No oxygen and a lot more CO2 in the atmosphere
And upon said death he would immediately shit himself. Mission accomplished!
Also a climate so scorching hot we won’t ever see anything like it again before 2030.
And release an incredible cocktail of gut and other bacteria on the world to entirely change the course of history.
This was my first thought, too 😂
Who pissed in your gene pool? ^it <sup>was</sup> <sup><sup>me</sup></sup>^
Buy a cheap pistol, go back in time, and shoot Gutenberg.
We’d still be living in medieval times.
I support this one.
My name is Friedrich Trump (aka Frederick Trump) and I already did that and even had a nice hump.
